Saturday, December 27, 2014

In Bath

Lacy and I arrived in *Bath today. I decided to leave my car at Lacy’s for now, so she and I traveled together and had time to talk. I told her my decision to go ahead with my non-profit rather than pursue grad school. She paused for a moment and said: “Anne, I know sometimes our opinions differ on things, and on this matter I advised a different course, but I also know you can do anything and I’m really looking forward to seeing you be stunningly successful with this project. Just promise to tell me how I can help.”

Lacy has been a rock in my life in so many ways. I don’t know where I’d be without her. It’s a relief to have the decision made and have her behind me.

We arrived at the townhouse late in the afternoon and Dad and Beth actually seemed glad to see me! (I think they were excited to show off the house.)

Beth’s friend Clara is still here and was all smiles and pleasantries, as usual. I shouldn’t be unkind, but it bugs me that she’s here, that Beth (and Dad too, I think) enjoy her false smiles and flattery and can’t see that she is not real. I don’t know what the real Clara is like, but the side we see of her is definitely not real - it is too polished and perfectly adjusts itself to whoever is in the room.

Over dinner I learned that no one had any interest in news from the Lodge. Aside from a passing, polite question about how Mary and her son are, they didn’t want to hear anything. They were much more interested in telling Lacy and I how much better their townhouse was than any of the places they had been to, how the interior had been designed by someone famous, the carpets were from somewhere exotic, etc. And apparently the entire social scene of Bath was mad about the Elliots being in town. Invitations poured in, I was told. Every party had to have them.

It’s so hard for me to sit through these conversations - where I am talked at about things that don’t matter to me at all. So much time and energy spent on such things…. I don’t know. I always think before I arrive “I will do better; I will listen with interest to the things that matter to my family, that is what one does.” And how hard is it to sit and smile and ask questions about whatever they want to talk about? It shouldn’t be hard, but I find it almost impossible to bear. I am hardly even required in these conversations. Am I wrong to be annoyed by this? I want to be with people who have an interest in my thoughts, my interests - maybe shared interests even!

They spoke of Will Elliot, at length. He is now considered to be without fault, it seems. So I must credit him with being good at making amends, at least! I listened to their description of him and his explanation for his previous behaviour with some skepticism, knowing it was being embellished, but curious still. Apparently it was all a misunderstanding - imagine that. I think it’s strange that previously we were not worth his knowing, and now we are all BFFs - there must be something behind that. He has just separated from his partner of several years, and I think Elizabeth was interested in him years ago, so perhaps that has started back up? Some comments by Clara to Beth made me think that Beth was entertaining this idea as well.

I attempted to tell them of my encounter with him in Lyme. It went roughly like this:

Me: You know, I think I bumped into Will in Lyme, we were staying at the same B&B-

Beth: Oh, yes, perhaps it was him. I think he mentioned traveling recently. It might have been him. You know, when he was here for dinner last Friday, he wore the most beautiful Armani suit, it was divine, and cut so perfectly.

Clara: Well, he certainly has the physique to pull off a look like that.

Beth: Yes, he is in very good shape. It’s terrible when men don’t take care of themselves.

Dad: He does look more worn and haggard than he did five years ago, I have to say. He was kind in saying that I haven’t changed at all, but I can’t return the compliment, I’m afraid. Which is not to say he is bad to look at - he looks a good deal better than many of the men I see in Bath!

Clara: If only all men were so lucky as you, Walter. I’m afraid you will always be surrounded by those who look rough and worn, while you stay as young like Peter Pan!

Dad: Clearly the women in Bath are unaccustomed to seeing any men worth looking at based on the effect of a one decent looking man arriving at a party! It’s shocking that a town like Bath attracts so many shabby looking people. We haven’t even spoken of the women - so many ugly women! Anne - how is Mary looking? The last time I saw her she had a red complexion. I hope that doesn’t happen every day.

Me: Oh no, that must have been accidental. Generally she has been quite well and looks good.

We were having this very stimulating conversation in the living room after dinner when the doorbell rang - at ten o’clock. Clara asserted, while elbowing Beth, that it would be Will, and she was right. And it was definitely the same man I met in Lyme.

He explained his late visit by saying he was visiting a friend nearby and thought he would pop in to see if Elizabeth was feeling okay, as she had been complaining of a possible cold when he last saw her. It was all done with great charm and good humour. Elizabeth confirmed she was feeling well, and Dad introduced me. I blushed, as I always tend to whenever a fuss is made over me. Will turned to look at me and started slightly. A cute look of astonishment settled on his face, answering my question of whether or not he knew who I was when we met in Lyme, which goes to show you what a small province this is really.

Will: But we know each other already, don’t we, Anne? This is funny! I’m very pleased to meet you and have a chance to get to know you better. You know, I spent a very solitary night at that B&B, listening to your party have a great time. I thought you must be a fun group and I wished I had had the courage to try to join you; I had no idea I had an acquaintance in the group! That will be a lesson to me to stop being so reserved and shy in hotels - if I had just I asked who you were, the name Musgrove would have been clue enough.

He sat next to me and asked about my time in Lyme and at my reference to an accident he pressed to know more. Dad and Elizabeth began to question me about it also - although previously they had had no interest in it at all. Will’s interest was more akin to Lacy’s - a desire to actually know what had happened, and expressing concern for what affect it must have had on me.

I admit to being quite surprised by how well my first night in Bath went.

* not actually Bath, just an alias place name

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